A Collection of Spectacles

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I’m obsessive so it’s best I channel my efforts towards a hobby and not a person. I do this thing where I delete apps off my phone when I’m nervous. Hearing that ping, a dating app mating call, cuts through the silence. I want to connect but I can’t reach through. If you dig deep enough, is it even worthwhile? Another day, another chance to fail at curbing my vices. We talked a lot about how secretive we could be and now you shy away when I’m too close to your phone. He said I was fucked up for cheating on him and writing about it. For all of my complaints, I could never give up my freedom for the affection of another, as imperfect as such a concept is. I guess I should focus less on changing for others and more on improving myself, or something like that.

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